And if you find work within yourself needing to be done, by all means, learn from it and do better.But, if you find that you are showing up whole, real and unassuming then keep on being your big, bold, bright self. use the experience with him to hone in on what you really want in a partner.Each month, a different editorial theme drives the writing, photography, and artwork that we publish.Learn more about us here, and find out how to submit your work here! We met on the Internet (we read each other’s blogs) and then became friends IRL when we both took classes at a summer art program in Philadelphia.Even though we went to different schools and lived in separate towns, we bonded over our similarities: We were both nerdy, ambitious feminists who liked to dress up and joke around.
As such, women often instantly assume that because a man said it, that comment must be true. What can a guy like that offer to the woman who is already taking pretty good care of herself? So, don't internalize "you're intimidating." Sure, absolutely self-reflect.
The expectations about what it takes to "be a real man" these days is convoluted and confusing. Every person comes with their own story about themselves (and their own self-worth, or lack of it) and what they want in a partner.
Men want to know they shine amongst the competition, so it's disheartening when they show up ready for validation only to find that the beautiful woman across the table is just as successful, can meet the basic needs in life herself, and is looking for something deeper and more profound than what the conventional paradigm offers. But, let's be crystal clear about something here, ladies: When a man says, "You’re intimidating", what he’s really saying is, " intimidated." And there is a BIG difference between the two. We are rarely privy to knowing any of that during the introduction stage of a relationship.
And that’s a gift that only comes from putting yourself out there in as real a way as possible. social pressure) to slow yourself down or make yourself smaller to give the potential greatness in another person a chance to catch up with you're own.
Ultimately, ladies: We get to choose how we react to other people's judgment. Dimming your light and power only enables their weakness and creates co-dependency, which is the opposite of what you truly desire.