However, the first date is always the most difficult.That's when you know you've put the last nail in the short answer is that if you're still feeling raw, you aren't going to be emotionally available for anyone else and it's best to take more time off.a longer answer is that the feelings of security or fear you get about being in a relationship or finding someone to play that role are just reactions to your own internal dialogue.
The one way to meld this "active" approach with the more cautious "wait until you are ready" approach, is to start out by limiting your goals and your "experiments." Don't try to fall in love with someone new, just because you stopped tearing up at the mention of your ex; set out to make just an ACQUAINTANCE first. After I got moved into my own house away from my ex, I thought that since we'd been at odds for years (no sex, no friendliness) that I was well done with being a married person. Not because I still pined for my ex, I wasn't ready because my entire psyche was set up to support being married for twenty years.On one hand, I know that I would like to meet someone to share new experiences with and I yearn for date-night again, but it just feels so crushingly weird and awkward. How long after your breakup did you start to comfortably date again? I add in a suggestion that you accept that this is an interactive process.You have to actually try to do things, to find out if you are ready to do things.My first meet and greet, was with a forum buddy, who was in town on business.Absolutely zero chance of anything more than a friendly drink and dessert treat.